Casper Inc buys Jacob Marley & Co

The headquarters of Casper Inc, an unashamed ghost corporation

Beijing-based Casper Inc announced yesterday plans to buy London cotton giant Jacob Marley Co for $666 million.

“With cotton supplies squeezed the amount of cotton stored in ICE-certified warehouses is at its lowest level since October 1995,” said Casper McFadden, a second-generation ghost. “We figured it was best to take control of the physical supply ourselves.”

He said that cotton was in demand among his clientele, who found it comfortable and easy to wash after romps through muddy graveyards. Silk, which casts a classier glint in the...